Healthy living

Green eyed monsters

It’s so easy to want what other people have.

The body, the house, the car, the husband, the half marathon time, the blog readership, the money, etc. I used to get very stuck in a cycle of “if I can get this, then everything will be perfect.”

Anyone else ever go there?

I get stuck in that cycle far less these days, but it’s still so tempting to compare myself to other people. Especially other women. Why do I do that?

Why is it so easy to focus on everything positive about her and focus on everything negative about me?

I can look at a picture of myself, like it, then keep looking at it until I loathe it.

I’m my own biggest critic. And that leads to me giving up rather than trying because, frankly, I’m terrified of failing. It’s so much easier to blame it on something else in my life. To say that if I had more money, or more time, then everything in my life would just effortlessly fall into place.

Guess what? Time and money are two things I’m not getting more of any time soon.

busier running

Harsh, but probably true.

It really comes down to not wanting to fail. I’m still really, really terrified of failure. Completely petrified.

But each failure is a learning lesson. I’m starting to drill that into my head. Missed my runs this week because I couldn’t drag my butt out of bed? I learned that I only get up when I put my phone on the other side of the room so I have to physically get up. Ate like crap the last two days? Remember to pack lunch the night before. Unhappy with my home décor? I’ve been procrastinating on cheap decorating ideas.

It’s the simple things. These are the things the women I envy do. Most of them work out at 5 am. Most of them have busy lives with jobs, kids, significant others, school, and a bazillion other things. Maybe, just maybe, I can use them as inspiration instead of envy.

Except for running skirts. I’m always going to envy those of you who can pull running skirts off without looking ridiculous.

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